For me to tell you that the last week of August is a hard one for me to swallow, every year, is an understatement. I lost my dad in 1988 on August 22 and then in 2016, on August 31, I lost my mother. You would think that there would be enough. years in between for me to get a grip on the grieving process but. nope, did.not.happen like that.

First let me say this, my mom and I were. not like the cozy mom and daughter duos you see all hugging and loving on each other all time, but, we did hug and we did love. Just a. little differently than most. My mom would tell me when I was a child that I acted so much like my dad (who she divorced when I was 4) that she couldn’t hardly stand it. She didn’t mean she couldn’t stand me, she simply wished I was more like her than him. And honestly, it would have been easier on everyone if that had been the case. But, we don’t get to pick our kids personalities.

On a side note, if we could pick our children’s personalities, both of my kids would be like their dad. I can get along with him much better than I can get along with myself. Mull that over and let it ferment for just a bit.

Anyway, I didn’t have a lot of time to prepare for losing my dad and while there was longer for me to get my thoughts together before I lost my mom, I didn’t take advantage of that time. I distinctively remember one night shortly before my mom died, I was doing laundry, making snacks, cleaning up, just about anything I could do to keep myself busy when one of my cousins that I was close with (close being relative, we were closer in spirit than we were in our actual presences, and that still rings true today, but we are close) came in the front door at my. mom’s house. I completely lost all of my wits. I was crying and just a mess.

My cousin pulled me out of he bear hug and said, “your mom is going to be with Jesus but you have kids now, you. have to be a Mother yourself, now pull yourself together.”

And, so I did.

Thanks for reading,

Jerri Ann